On New Years Eve most people are looking ahead.
Some are concentrating their thoughts to the long night ahead of them, good friends, good food and good times. Others are looking further ahead to the coming weeks and months, meticulously planning how to achieve the (probably long) list of resolutions before them.
I too have thought ahead and have envisaged my “perfect life”. Personally, professionally, socially and spiritually. I don’t have a game plan as such but I’m not worrying about it, worrying is like praying for what you don’t want.
I have however selected my one word for 2014 and if I’m constantly mindful of it in the coming year I can’t stray too far from the ideals I’ve set for myself.
Today however I have set aside to look back, acknowledge, accept and let go ..
It’s been a battle to get to the point where I’m ready to cut the ties that bind. I’ve told myself for the longest time that if I accept things I’m disappointed with, then I’m saying “that I’m ok with it” when in fact the complete opposite is true.
But I’ve come to the conclusion that you can fly higher when you carry less baggage and I’m ready to rise above the clouds and soar!
So today I will cull the “friends list”. I’ll accept that if someone has owed you $500.00 for over a year and has repaid you a total of $15.00 (in $5 increments) that they have absolutely no intention of repaying the balance owed even when they know that money came from your child’s savings account. I will acknowledge the anger I feel when I see them made up and out on the town enjoying life and the annoyance of seeing goods and gifts they purchase.
I’ve asked so many times how can I right this and you know what came to me?
*which is actually quite funny if you know the full story*
I *finally* have the wisdom to know that the thing I can change, is me. No longer will I allow hatred to reside in my heart. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Like the saying goes forget the past with the exception of what you learned from it.
The lesson that I have come away with is that I am accountable for my own life I can not blame anyone or anything and if I don’t like something, I have two choices, accept it or change it.
Today I am accepting of my feelings and my faults so that tomorrow I can start refreshed and renewed.
Till next time