Managing Fear
I have many fears most of which are totally #firstworldproblems
While there are people living in war torn countries that have every right to be afraid I’m over here being freaked out by crickets who have “dared” to find shelter in my lounge and stupid inanimate objects like a timber box!
Box Jumps are one of those things that still scare me. Just as I become proficient at one height and can merrily jump without hesitation as soon as I flip that box over to the next height, I find myself right back to the very beginning – hesitating in front of the box, looking, edging forward, backing away a bit, waiting for courage. Staring at that damn box and screaming at myself in frustration (sometimes internally, most of the time not).
It’s weird right?
I’ll happily fling my legs up into the air and stand on my hands, anytime, anywhere and without abandon. I’ll even perform arm balances on kb’s, large tyres or even moving skateboards but jumping on a box takes a good 20 minutes of “discussion with myself” and a half mile run up.
Or is it weird?
Think about it. Outside of the gym, when was the last time you jumped as high as you could into the air? I’m guessing that unless you play basketball, volleyball or are fleeing from police (or zombies) and need to clear a fence, the need to jump (especially if you are a woman) just doesn’t seem to come up that often.
So I guess a little apprehension isn’t totally unfounded.
If you are thinking that this blog post has some kind of revelation about overcoming your fears that I’m about to share with you all – then think again, because if I had such an epiphany the box wouldn’t have beaten me today – and it did. *sigh*
Although unplanned, I managed to jump atop of the big box (twice) last Friday – today it just wasn’t happening regardless of how many times I screamed at the top of my lungs in frustration. Even definitive proof that I’d make it didn’t stop me from pulling short repeatedly.
See that main photo? Well the box in front is the “big box” and I’m jumping onto a box that’s slightly smaller behind it and frame after frame shows that I’d clear the box easily. So for now, instead of feeling like a failure I’m going to expose myself to my fears at manageable levels and take that power back!
What does that mean? Well for now I’ll continue to jump on the “bigger than the middle box but not quite as big as the big” box until the the next time I’m ready to embrace my fearlessness …
Being fearless isn’t being 100% unafraid,
it’s about being scared shitless and jumping anyway
Till next time
