Parenting – before and after
I still remember the discussions James and I used to have about our kids or more accurately our future kids because at that stage they weren’t even dividing cells.
We’d have three kids (all of which I’d have naturally without pain relief) whom James would teach how to surf and our family would spend the entire summer at the beach (obviously I’d be the hot Mum sunning herself on the beach). We’d even gone so far as to surmise that our children would arrive in the following order boy-boy-girl, because all girls should have an older brother who can “deal to” any unwanted male attention. Although my younger (but much larger) brother did just a good a job as any older brother could ever have done. 😉
That of course all changed when I went into labour with Isabelle. We were now going to be content with just the kid that was trying to fit her large head through my not as child raring hips as I had thought they were as I was NEVER EVER EVER doing this again.
Oh bless …
We just assumed that our kids would just fit seamlessly into our lifestyles, they’d be like those cute lapdogs that people tote around in fancy bags but better dressed. Little did we know that we would ultimately work around their schedules, at least until they were at the age where they showed a desire to get involved in the same activities as us.
Suffice to say our views on parenting before we were actually parents is almost as cute as the discussions our two (yeah I went there again) now have with each other – case in point this is the exact conversation Elias (5) and Isabelle (7) had last night on the way home from Crossfit kids about their brand new cousins Thea and Loki.
Isabelle – Mum, I’ve made them both cards and I want to buy Thea some clothes.
Isabelle – Elias, what are you going to get Thea?
Elias – A coathanger
Me – *hysterical laughter*
Elias – Girls like coat hangers! What else are they going to do with all those clothes!
Me – *yet more hysterical laughter*
Elias – Well, she can’t put the clothes on the floor, Mums don’t like that, only Dad’s don’t mind
To be fair, it’s true that James would much rather have Elias’ clothes strewn over his floor than lego, that stuff is lethal!
If I had known then what I know now would I still have excitedly jumped into parenthood?
Well I definitely would have paused for thought if I’d known that I’d end up 30kgs heavier even after the kidlet had been evicted from my tummy and it would take 4 years 7 months and 17 days until I got my first full nights sleep but like Selena so eloquently states “the heart wants what it wants” and I doubt even that wouldn’t have dissuaded me from making beautiful humans. Finding out that I’d have to share my dessert though! Honestly, I’d never realized how much my Dad must have loved me until that day I gave up what was on my plate for the little person staring back at me, just like my Dad had done for me so many times before.
I’d probably have given myself a heads up that things would have to change a bit at first because kids aren’t as willing to sit quietly and watch you do what they deem as “boring shit” as you’d imagine, but give it time because one day that “boring shit” is exactly what your kids will want to do – right beside you AND they’ll do it so much better, which you think would annoy the bejesus out of you, but it doesn’t because you are just so god damn proud.
Till next time