Its going to be a long road ..

So the dilemma that I had over whether to go to Australia has been taken out of my hands (God works like that I suppose).

I spent the day with Dad at the hospital on Friday, we saw about a million doctors, a speech therapist, dietitian, nursing staff and even the stop smoking team (a bit late for that now though!) .. anyway I digress;  Dad needs to have major surgery .. they are removing the entire tongue, all his lymph nodes, all his teeth and most of his jaw, then after all of that he gets to undergo a barrage of radiation and the doctors were quite up front and said that he had a 50 50 chance of coming through it all .. but if they did nothing, he would have about six months .. a year max … so its going to be a long and hard road, for all of us.

And to top it all off, Mum is going into hospital four days after Dad goes in to have both of her knees replaced!

It does put my problems into perspective …

Anyway, I spoke to them both about doing the show and they were both adamant that I should carry on and do the Auckland show, Dad’s exact words were “what good is you sitting next to me in the hospital going to do .. its not like I’ll be up for conversation anyway, go and compete” (Have I ever mentioned I love my Dad!)

However I’m not doing anymore shows this year because they will both be home soon after the Auckland show (all going well) and will need someone to care for them, and well that’s my role :)

I’ve found that my mind isn’t as focused as normal .. and my food hasn’t been fab, but I don’t want to let the cancer beat me … Dad is a fighter and so am I!  I’m annoyed that I am going to go into this show not as sharp as I could because I cant get my head clear of all this worry, but Id be more annoyed to just stop … Id probably fall to pieces completely if I wasn’t training!

Oh and its day light savings .. argh … it meant getting up at 4.30 am (which is now 5.30 am) .. whos stupid idea was daylight savings anyway 😉

So here are this weeks pics .. not much change because my measures are the same, but hopefully with two weeks to go there will be some kind of movement!

Click on photo to enlarge (click back to return)

Click on photo for bigger image (click back to return)

Ending on a high note .. i’ve got some “blog love” to tell you about.  I’ve been following the journey of Donloree towards her very first competition, its a fab reminder of all those feelings you get when you are training for your first show, all the unknowns!

She always makes me smile .. go and check her out at Bikini or Bust

Till next time xox

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1 Response

  1. Helene says:

    Couz you are so amazing – I can only imagine the fears you must be feeling for your parents :(

    You know that your family are very dear to me & I hold you all in my heart
    for safe keeping.

    I am here to help in any way I can – except I still can’t cook LOL !!!

    Your not alone xxx

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